FUN FUN FUN!!!

Still Wana Be Teacher?

TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday?
STUDENT: Seven.
TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday?
STUDENT: Nine.
TEACHER: That's impossible.
STUDENT: No, it isn't, Teacher. I'm eight today.


SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Are you chewing gum?
BILLY: No, I'm Billy Anderson.


TEACHER: Didn't you promise to behave?
STUDENT: Yes, Sir.
TEACHER: And didn't I promise to punish you if you didn't?
STUDENT: Yes, Sir, but since I broke my promise, I don't 
         expect you to keep yours.


TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY:   Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.


HAROLD: Teacher, would you punish me for something I
     didn't do?
TEACHER: Of course not.
HAROLD: Good, because I didn't do my homework.


TEACHER: I hope I didn't see you looking at Don's paper.
JOHN: I hope you didn't either.


GARY: I don't think I deserve a zero on this test.
TEACHER: I agree, but it's the lowest mark I can give you.


MOTHER: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?
JUNIOR: Because of absence.
MOTHER: You mean you were absent on the day of the test?
JUNIOR: No, but the kid who sits next to me was.


SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.


TEACHER: Well, at least there's one thing I can say about
         your son.
FATHER : What's that?
TEACHER: With grades like these, he couldn't be cheating.


TEACHER: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.
SAMMY: You can't fool me, Teacher... snakes don't have feet.


HYGIENE TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by
                 biting insects?
JOSE : Don't bite any.


TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
ELLEN : I is...
TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."


TEACHER: Max, use "defeat," "defense," and "detail" in 
         a sentence!
MAX: The rabbit cut across the field, and defeat went 
     over defense before detail.


MOTHER : Why on earth did you swallow the money I gave you?
JUNIOR : You said it was my lunch money.


TEACHER: If you received $10 from 10 people, what would
         you get?
SASHA: A new bike.


TEACHER: If you had one dollar and you asked your father
         for another, how many dollars would you have?
VINCENT: One dollar.
TEACHER: (sadly) You don't know your arithmetic.
VINCENT: (sadly) You don't know my father.


TEACHER: If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight
         oranges in the other, what would I have?
CLASS COMEDIAN: Big hands!


BOY : Isn't the principal a dummy!
GIRL: Say, do you know who I am?
BOY : No.
GIRL: I'm the principal's daughter.
BOY : And do you know who I am?
GIRL: No.
BOY : Thank goodness!

posted by - PC - @ 11:23 PM